Tie Tuesday: Books edition

One thing I retained and even expanded on from when I was Christian is my love for books and reading. I grew up watching my parents reading and collecting books. As a kid and then a young adult, I tried to “love reading” but just couldn’t muster the enthusiasm for it like I saw my parents have. Sure, I had books and read on occasion, but it just wasn’t the same.

When I came back to Christ after finishing the Army in 1989, I dedicated myself to reading, studying and really learning the Bible and Theology. This led to a love for reading all things Christian and all things do do with theology, apologetics and doctrine.

I can emphatically say that one of the greatest gifts in my Christian life was the love of reading and learning that it grew in me over the decades. Now as a Deconverted Christian, I still love books, reading, learning and growing in understanding of the world around me. I just have a much wider and less narrowed interest in subjects. 

I can honestly say… Thank God, wherever She is, for books and the ability to read.


Who and What am I? 

In fact you are a militant atheist evangelist out to pull believers from their faith. Clearly, undermining my encouragement to believers helps you accomplish that.

It would seem from the comments and jabs from SOME people in my former Faith of Christianity, that I’m constantly being misunderstood or misconstrued or outright misrepresented as automatically Atheist… even a Radical/Militant Atheist Missionary… since my deconversion from the faith I once held for 34yrs, 25 of those in various roles of what I call Avocational or Lay Ministry.

Regardless of my repeated attempts to correct and readjust their understanding about my present status as simply ‘not a Christian anymore’, these individuals for reasons of their own have chosen to continue referring to me and apparently all former Christians who are now deconverted as Atheists. And if we have the temerity and gall to actually tell others of our transition or explain the faults and inaccuracies in the foundations of our Former Faith, well then we are further branded and castigated, both to out faces and broadcast widely to others, that we are Militant Atheists. 

And no, as I repeatedly tell you, one does not automatically become an atheist simply by not being a Christian.
I am not an atheist. I’m just not a Christian anymore. Please adjust your understanding and what you tell others about me. It’s just not honest and you know it.

This post is an effort to put it in stone and cement it in concrete so firm that you would have to pay someone to misunderstand it for you. There are those are so employed and for a nominal fee with a hefty consequence to your touch with reality, will never the less be happy to oblige. These are of course the Apologists, amateur or otherwise, internet blog based… or otherwise. None of them ACTUALLY wise at all.

My wife and I stepped away from Christianity due to newer evidence, new to us anyway, that the Faith we once followed and served others in was “founded upon sinking sand”. We became aware, thru YouTube videos, blogs and other articles available on the internet (where religions come to die) that we had been misled and were misleading others… for decades. 

Not any more. Jesus is not Lord, the God of the Bible is a Bronze and Iron Age religious and cultural myth. If there is a God or intelligence ot there… in here… somewhere, the God of the Bible isn’t Him/Her/It or Whatever.

We are not Christians anymore. That’s it. I realize for the truly indoctrinated and brainwashed members of our Former Faith, this comes as a complete shock and awe moment which screams “if you reject the True God ™ and there are no others but False gods remaining, then it MUST mean that you are Atheists.  This would be an error in thinking and reacting Rationally.  Admittedly, these are not representative of the majority of Christianity, but it seems that the internet and blogs are somewhat over represented by this type of Christian. Thus the need to constantly remind them of their mistaken identity of me and my wife as Atheists rather than simply… as we have had to continually correct them… Not Christians Anymore.

In hope this has been helpful… Brother Wally. Otherwise, get over it. It’s really not about you anyways. So stop it already. 


The God of Slavery

((Reposted in response to a Christian’s post on slavery in the bible and exercised by Christians in history. She was rightly shocked, but apparantly found a way to reconcile the horror to herself and her faith. How about you? -kia))

God, in the OT law, actually gave instructions regulating and proscripting slavery. Ex 21. In the nt, there were instructions on how to treat your slaves, how slaves were not to run away from their masters and treat them with due respect, but not one word condemning, talking down, or outlawing slave ownership. Philmon was even about the return of a slave that had run away, accepted jesus, and was now being sent back to his ‘owner’ as a brother in christ.
Ownership of another human being, we all know nowadays, is never ever acceptable or conscienable. Seems that the god of the Bible didn’t know that. And that’s why his people throughout the centuries never knew that either, but rather practiced it with biblical authority.
Yes, it’s pretty hard to accept and understand. But that is what the Bible teaches.


Owning and controlling other people as property, or like animals is Evil. Period!!

The God of the bible had alot to say about the subject of slavery, both directly in the ot cmandments and regulations and indirectly thru ‘holy men of God who spoke as the spirit gave them inspiration’.

Here’s one of them

For Mandy’s information

There is no sense in pretending slavery in the old testament or new testament was different than what we know today.

(Edit 10/10/16: Or was equivalent to Parenthood in the slightest. -kia)

It was not. But even if it was…

Why regulate and allow for the ‘owning of other persons‘ when you could just denounce it and ‘thou shalt not’ it as what everyone with a conscience knows it to be… Morally Evil and repugnant?

Question for the crowd:

So if we all know that Slavery of ANY type is inherently Evil… Why doesn’t the God of the Bible know?


The God of slavery… again?

It seems that some people just haven’t learned anything

KIAOctober 27, 2016 at 2:37 am

“Because it’s pretty obvious that “captivity” wasn’t such a bad situation for that bird!”

Of course you can’t ask the bird, but you can ask those humans who have been slaves or any sane and intelligent human his opinion of ‘captivity’ vs freedom. I’m sure most people would gladly choose freedom over bondage, even if that leads to a more unsure life or earlier death.
Nothing justifies slavery. Nothing

If you dare, as much as it will pain me to point you there and you to read it, Check out Antebellum Amanda’s post trying to justify Biblical Slavery as ‘not so bad after all’ by justifying slavery in general as better than dying from too much freedom. What an Amazing crock of Bovine Excrement. While you’re at it, check out my first response post to her part one post. She was trying to equate Biblical Slavery to Parenting, of all things… Cringe!!

The levels one must stoop to in order to answer for and excuse the god of the Bible. It’s a very good thing that no such being actually exists outside of the pages of the Old and New Testaments.


Criticizing bad ideas is not bullying or abusing People

A comment I left for a blogging buddy

Wally, you need to see the difference between criticizing ideas and criticizing people. I know there is a huge identity in being a believer. At one time, for much longer and more involved than you have yet been, my life was ‘hid with Christ’. My whole identity was ‘Christ’. I also took it very personally when people cricized my faith, beliefs and ideas in Christianity. But they weren’t mocking or ridiculing me as a person. They were questioning and challenging, even mocking ideas. 

When some one criticizes your ideas and beliefs, then you respond by attacking them personally as if they had attacked you personally, that is bullying and reveals how insecure and immature you are in who you are and what you believe.

I did not bully you or tom or cs. I criticized his posts and ideas as of late. You and Tom chose to make it personal by attacking me, as if I had attacked you personally rather than your beliefs and ideas. You are the bullies here brother, not me.

I just said, I hope you had a good Sunday. Think about it.


I am Crucified with Christ, therefore I no longer live

When you’re whole identity is wrapped up in a religious idea, you take it personally when you really shouldn’t. Christianity makes you do and say things to people you hardly know and hardly know you that you wouldn’t ever otherwise say or do. 

After you “come unto me with the Faith of little children and babes”, it regresses your emotional and intellectual maturity to that of “children and little babes”. You can no longer separate when others are just asking you to think about your beliefs, ideas and faith, or criticizing, mocking or ‘bullying’ you as a person. 

So you bully back when you think others are bullying you. But we aren’t. No matter how soft or considerate or polite we are being… even when we are just saying “have a great day”, there will be some like Wally here that will call it bullying because of their perceived animosity in your words. And they will feel fully justified in bullying back, even if their scripture tells them 

  • “not to repay evil for evil”, 
  • “turn the other cheek”, 
  • “vengeance is mine thus saith the lord”, and 
  • “not to resist evil” and 
  • “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”.

Wally doesn’t have the intellectual or emotional maturity to deal with questions and challenges to his Faith, ideas, beliefs. It was stolen from him as if he never had it to begin with, and I think he probably did as he ‘came to faith’ much later in life than I did. This is what Faith and reliance on only absolute confirmation of what you believe and think to be true does to you. 

Hearing voices in your head

It makes you hear “I hope you had a great sunday” and “Have a nice day” as if they are really cursing you and bullying you personally. You say, “Have a Nice Day…” they hear “F*ck You, buddy”. If your ideas and beliefs can’t take questions and challenges and out right denials without you thinking people are mocking you personally, then maybe, just maybe they aren’t so solid, relaible and true after all. Better look into that. And oh, by the way…

Have a Great Day and Week, Brother Wally.


For TJ’s Household Haiku Challenge

Yes, it’s time from another of TJ’s Haiku Challenges. This week the themes are Ancient and Moment. I’ll once again allow him to explain.

The challenge words for this week are “Moment” and “Ancient

You can use either the words or the picture to construct your own haiku and add a link in the comments section at the end of the post (press the black speech bubble to access)

For my entry I chose very personal reflections for the month of April. 

Life is but a whisker 

Days shaved off, years like stubble.

Turn chore into joy.


I’ve been shaving ‘old school’ with a double edged safety Razor for about two and a half years. As of yet, I haven’t worked up the courage for these boys yet. But when I do, they will be ready for me. (I’ll probably cut my fool head off) They are both late thirties or early forties vintage, like my parents were. Their birthdays were both in April and my mom passed four years ago on the 13th at the age of 72. Priceless for their years and wisdom. I miss them both dearly. 

There isn’t a day goes by that I am not haunted by short, and sometimes sharp and crystal clear Moments in time that have been frozen in my memory from the past, just waiting to be thawed by the warmth of love and feelings that I still have for them. I will always love my mom and dad, and my even my twin brother who has passed also since. Like these blades, their memories have the ability to separate me from my present and transport me to happier times when we were all together as one family. It’s just my sister and me now.

Generations we.

With a smile, she watched as they ate.

Echoes from the past.


We also went out tonight for our “Friday night date night” to one of favorite places downtown. It’s a quaint wine bar/Italian eatery just off of an historic century old hotel in the center of town. My gaze was drawn by the sweet sight of an octogenarian grandmother surrounded by three more generations of her family. It was a special moment in time to be savored, like the wine we had and the gourmet pizza we were served. 

Your voice still echoes

Present with us from the past

I will not forget


April has never been the same since

If there is one thing I’ve learned since my dad passed 7yrs ago, my mom 4yrs ago, my brother 3yrs ago and my own last grandmother just last year, is that moments are easy to miss. They are damned easier to take for granted. 

Love your family while they are here. Live and love in the moments you will no longer have once they are gone, just like the ritual of a brush and bowl shave with a 70yr old heirloom, or a family dinner with four generations sharing the table.

Enjoy the moment. Take it all in. Never allow yourself the luxury of taking it for granted. 

To live Ancient Moments in Present Reality is to carry your loved ones with you even after they have passed on. Their memories still breathe… in you 

Now for you… how would you answer TJ’s challenge? Tell me in the comments below and why not visit to tell him yourself. Enjoy… life 


Reblog from a new friend: “what is wrong with me?”

It takes courage to ask those questions. Courage to risk telling your husband/life partner. And it’s scary as hell. Here’s to being courageous enough to ask “what’s wrong with me?” -kia

Skirt On A Vent

I couldn’t sing yesterday.

My husband and I attend a church plant. It’s a small group, meets in a school cafeteria, and we are part of the actual plant team from the big church across the river. I’m a musician and singer, but not for the plant. They got someone younger and hipper to do that. Which is fine. Especially now.

So yesterday the leader started playing his guitar and singing (beautifully, I might add – really, no sour grapes) the familiar lyrics of songs I myself have lead in other services. Words of God’s beauty, God’s breath of life, God’s wisdom, God’s blessing. At first I sang along.

And then I couldn’t.

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For Pastor Greg Locke this evening

Here is his inane and imbecilic tweet for your perusal

“Atheism is like North Korea. Both will find out one day how small they are and that they poked the wrong person trying to be cute.” –Pastor Greg Locke

It has but one answer…

“Religion is a totalitarian belief. It is the wish to be a slave. It is the desire that there be an unalterable, unchallengeable, tyrannical authority who can convict you of thought crime while you are asleep, who can subject you to total surveillance around the clock every waking and sleeping minute of your life, before you’re born and, even worse and where the real fun begins, after you’re dead. A celestial North Korea. Who wants this to be true? Who but a slave desires such a ghastly fate? I’ve been to North Korea. It has a dead man as its president, Kim Jong-Il is only head of the party and head of the army. He’s not head of the state. That office belongs to his deceased father, Kim Il-Sung. It’s a necrocracy, a thanatocracy. It’s one short of a trinity I might add. The son is the reincarnation of the father. It is the most revolting and utter and absolute and heartless tyranny the human species has ever evolved. But at least you can f#$%ing die and leave North Korea!”

― Christopher Hitchens

Forgiving God and Fallible People

It seems that Recovery from “Knowing it All” and telling others so, when one has discovered that he’s been misled and wrong for decades, is not so simple as my sometimes utterly simplistic and hopelessly flailing attempts have striven hard to make it.

Who’d a thunk that the root of the issue in my Recovery would ultimately be found to be… 

… my own seeming inability and stubborned unwillingness to forgive the Biblical Abrahamic God who I now know is not even there to accede to my demands for Repentance, and the lack of compassion and true empathy for those who, as I was for so long, are unwilling by sheer force of indoctrinated and emotionally manipulated will, and in many ways, although obviously to various degrees, highly educated and otherwise in other situations perhaps good and moral in their own rights… yet seemingly made adled in those qualities… are Resistant and Unable to respond intelligently and respectfully when asked to answer questions that led to my Faith’s demise and even challenged to defend the answers that they, like I had before them, had been provided to provide to others like me.

    Run on sentence not withstanding… 

    How does one move forward in recovery from abuse, real or imagined, without first being willing and able to forgive their abuser, even if he is not actually there to be forgiven or receive absolution? 

    How does one forgive the God he thought he knew, but now realizes was only a Colossal Mind and Life F*ck? And then the second part… 

    How does one find the compassion and empathy to continue communicating with and exchanging with those who’s mission it is, both personally and ministry wise, to defend the Faith… their Faith… at all costs against the perceived ‘assault of the Enemy’? 

    My next steps in The Journey

    I am not an atheist. At least I don’t think so… Yet. However I know now that the God I once believed in and served and taught others to love and serve, the God of the bible, the Abrahamic God of the Jews, Christians and Muslims (although Christians and Jews would disagree), and the Jesus described in the New Testament as the ‘Only Begotten Son of God’, crucified, risen and soon returning… are not real, but built on cultural myths and religious fiction. 

    If there is a God “of All there Is”, and I still believe there could be, He or She… or It would be nothing like the God I once thought and believed I knew better than I knew any other person on the planet. If there really is a God of ultimateity, love, hope and peace… THAT God would most likely have no need of our repentance, nor would we need His Forgiveness. 

    We could do nothing that would affect Him or change Him or offend Him in anyway. If He is “all love” and all mercy, our failures and imperfections would not surprise Him in the slightest. He would demand no other sacrifice than a life well lived, loving heart that meets others where they are, and hands that are willing to serve those around them in true and selfless compassion and empathy. 

    Forgiveness is for the Forgiver as well as the Forgiven

    Its high time I Forgave the God I believed in for 34 years and served in various roles of ‘lay’ or as I call it Avocational Ministry for 25 years. It’s not his fault. He’s not there to demand repentance from. He doesn’t exist to explain or correct or apologize for anything. 

    And its high time I Forgave those who, being misled and lied to themselves, misled and lied to me. They are as I was, emotionally manipulated and religiously indoctrinated in centuries old bullshit that they have been taught is eternally dangerous and damning to question or deny. Its not their fault, not fully anyway. 

    The toughest thing I have had to deal with these last two years is the inner turmoil and Questioning, the self guilt and hiding from others who and what I am becoming… A non believer, cut off from the safety and security of a ready-made and supportive Community of Faith. No one wants to be alone in the world. We are beginning to find Community and Friends again… outside of our previous Faith. But it’s been difficult. 

    But we are moving Forward, not back.

    Sometimes I wish I could go back to when I first watched those debate videos with Apologists trying desperately, and failing, to answer those “questions that must not be asked” and defend those “answers which must not be questioned” coming from the other side of the podium. But you cant go back. You cannot unsee what has been revealed. You cannot be reinserted into the Matrix you now know to be a lie. 

    Maturity and self responsibility are about going forward, as scary and as uncertain as that may be. And to do so, I need to forgive the God I once knew, the people who still serve Him, and lastly… myself for having been misled and misleading others also. The Recovery continues. Join us. There’s room enough for all on this Road.